ORIGINAL QUESTION:

I'm having trouble getting along with the new Redience director in my building. I've been an RA for nearly 4 years and I'm graduating in May. How do I keep from wanting to kill her till the end of the year? She's on a total power trip about everything, from deciding the staff on-call weekends to programming requirements. What's worse is she's my age, she started being an RA when I became one and now, since she's graduated and became an RA, her ego is huge! The staff consensus is that she is so far 'up housing's butt' that you can barely see her feet. (someone elses words, not mine.)

ANSWER 1:

I'm sorry your relationship with your new RD is not going well. Without knowing any details, here are some things I would advise:

1. Show her respect - There needs to be mutual respect, and while it sounds like she may have some work to do in that area, remember it is a two way street. Ask yourself how she perceives you as well!

2. Give feedback - Your supervisor should be open to feedback from her staff members. Find a way to give her objective feedback (constructive), including how you believe the problem can be aleviated. (in other words, don't just whine. Offer solutions or suggestions.)

3. The next step - If you feel change needs to happen, and your supervisor will not listen to your feedback, you may wish to approach her supervisor about it (with the same suggestions as listed above).

ANSWER 2:

This does not sound like too much fun my friend. I guess I have one thing to ask you...Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy? Sam, you are leaving college and going into the REAL world in 4 months or so, right? Maybe it is time to focus more on the future than the present. That is NOT to say that you should just avoid this situation all together - but maybe not direct too much energy toward it either. Is there a way for you to appease her to some degree? Do what she wants and just live your life?

I am the last person to suggest that you retire as an RA. You must LOVE the job or you would not have stayed with it all of these years. You TOO have given your time. If you all were RAs together as you mentioned, do you have a relationship with her that might allow you to provide her with some feedback about her leadership style without the possibility of repercussions to yourself? Maybe you could help her to learn the nuances of her new position. If she is committed to student affairs work then she should also be open to feedback from those around her. I caution you that she is the RD so your tone and delivery need to take into account the position that she holds. Approach her respectfully. See what happens...

1. Reconnect with your staff to see how everyone is doing and how they feel about the loss of the staff member. If everyone is okay, it should be business as usual. If not, you may need to discuss what the loss means to the "team" and how you might compensate for that loss.

2. Work on welcoming whoever is hired into the position. It is usually very difficult for a new RA to take the place of an RA during the school year. The new RA may get the negative feedback from the floor. They may be made to feel less of an RA by some staff members who are upset about the loss. Plus they are just learning the position, so they are usually overwhelmed and could use the help and support.

3. Be careful not to be too demanding of your Hall Director. Trust their judgment. They typically can not share with you why the RA was fired so don't expect to get an answer. It would be against the law for them to go into personnel issues with people outside the issue. I would additionally suggest you may need to help support the Hall Director since they may get some grief from residents or other RAs about the firing depending on the RAs "fan club".

Just some thoughts. Hope this helps.

Ray

In general I think that it is important for the staff to move forward after the RA was fired. It doesn't matter if the firing was deemed appropriate or inappropriate by the staff. The bottom line is that the staff is there for the students and this should not be compromised by in-fighting among the staff as to the firing. The staff needs to find a suitable replacement as soon as possible and welcome that person into the staff. If there is an issue as to the reason for firing or how it was done, this should be done with the Hall Director, or supervisor, and in private. This is the appropriate and professional manner with which to deal with this issue. It should not be done in public with residents. That approach undermines the staff unity and staff credibility which in turn can make the whole year difficult for everyone.

It is also important to not discuss the issues of the firing with the residents. The only person that has the right to do that is the fired RA. If s/he chooses to discuss the details of the incident that is fine, but it is not appropriate for other staff members to divulge non-public details. This is a personal and personnel issue. Also, by not lingering on the issue with residents they can move on and deal with the transition to the new RA.

Gavin

Answer 3

Any time a staff member is released from their contract [or fired] it creates an immediate hole in the staff - residents notice this gap. I'd encourage your staff to be upfront with their residents that "Jane/Bob are no longer on staff." There is no need to discuss how or why...that is confidential. But, it is fair to let the residents know that they are not going to return.

Also, between your staff members themself, I think it is always healthy to make a pact that any and all discussions about what happened with "Jane/Bob" will be conducted behind closed doors and will be held in confidence. Your staff members may be having an emotional reaction to this loss, or they just might want to meet to talk and gossip about what happened. Either way --> it must be kept confidential in order to protect "Jane/Bob" and the integrity of the staff itself.

Tara

This situation is often difficult especially if the staff member was popular. I think it's import for the staff to remain professional about the situation and to remember they may not have all the information about the situation. A while back we had to fire a very popular RA for violating policy in a different center. Being that it is a personnel issue we were not a liberty to discuss it with the rest of the staff and the staff member choose not to tell why he was being fired or a least didn't tell the whole truth. So if you believed him it seemed like we were not being fair but in fact we were. I think being a good staff members will sometimes require blind trust. I do think the staff should talk about it but realize the folks making the decision won't be able to share everything. Good luck. tim.