Q.
If you could identify one key to promoting successful
roommate relationships, what would it be?
A.
I think it is best to try to encourage the roommates
to work it out on
their own first. If needed, you can give some
advice to a roommate who
complains to you. If they are not able to resolve
it, see if they are both
willing to sit down with you and talk about it.
Make sure you hear both
sides, and don't be biased toward one person just
because they came to
you first with their side of the story.
Click
here to see a roommate discussion paper that I
typed up, and if you like it, you
can download the file.
Dan Oltersdorf - Colorado State
University
A.
Have a mediation with both residents in a room.
Set boundary rules first, only one person talks
at a time, no interrupting, and hear the other
person out.
Leigh
Ann Lorusso - University of Wisconsin at
Whitewater
A.
Do roomate agreement forms at the beginning
of the year. When a conflict arises, you pull
that out, and find out what agreements were
broken, and what needs to be changed to aleve
the incident.
Jennifer
Anderson - Southern Methodist University
A.
It's like counseling, I suppose...Go in, sit
down, and get them to talk about the things
that bother them. Gently bring up uncomfortable
issues. Don't fill in awkward silences; let
them do it. Mediate - make sure things stay
under control and fair - but don't take over.
Be prepared for tears or angry outbursts. Try
not to be phased. The more calm you stay, the
more calm they will stay. Emphasize compromise,
and if need be, throw in helpful reminders (without
being condescending) about being adults...(hint,
hint). If all else fails, let them duke it out.
(No, that last part probably isn't a good idea.)
Sara Schaeffner - University
of Vermont
A.
Mediation! It's important that they communicate
so that THEY can
solve the problem--sometimes they need a third
person to step in to ensure that everyone gets
heard and all options are aired...additionally,
another opinion never hurts. The important thing
is to get them talking to each other in a safe,
beneficial way
Amber Benoit - Colorado State
University
A.
Triad mediation is always good.
Refer back to roommate agreements completed
-hopefully- when they moved in. Compromise
Compromise Compromise!
Michael
Wilde - Concordia College
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